Those Sacrificial Little Things
by YoriYuuki
Summary: Buffy died sacrificing herself for Dawn. But now she's back, with no memories and with the voice of William in her head guiding her. Will she get her memories back? Will she fall for the vampire that reminds her most of William?
1. Chapter 1

There was no pain. No fear. No doubt. I knew that I was done. The second I jumped off that tower in Dawnies' place, I knew. I knew I was safe and invited death in with open arms.

Suspended in the air, feeling my life slowly drain out of me, I risked one last glance at my family (and yes I included Spike in that family). I saw theirlooks of horror at what I was doing. Their sadness. Their pain. And I smiled at them. I don't know if thet saw it.

Then there was nothing. I felt no more, but I still saw. My essence stayed in place and I watched my lifeless body fall to earth, no longer suspended by the portal. I slowely lowered myself to the ground and stood next to my body.

Gradually all the Scoobies were by my side, disbelief written all over their faces. I silently shed a tear for their grief, trying to convey to them that I was safe. At the time I couldn't comprehend that they did not know I was there.

A limping Spike was the last one to the scene, falling to his kness when he failed to hear a heart beating in my chest. With his face burried in his hands, I watched as the tears flowed freely and sobs hitched in his throat.

The sight was heartbreaking and I quickly averted my gaze. My eyes swept over Xander with a badly beaten Anya in his arms .With her head resting on his shoulder, the two gazed on stonily. No expression on either face.

I turned to look at the pair of witches. They were holding onto eachother, keeping the other on their feet as tears slid freely down each of their cheeks. My attention was shifted to the man I consider my father. Giles looked broken. Unwilling to believe. Had he not been frozen in shock I imagine he would be on his knees mnuch like Spike, crying.

It was too much heartbreak for me and I turned to look at movement on the stairs to the tower. _Dawnie._ I couldn't tell which hurt her more. The still bleeding slices in her abdomen, or the knowledge that she had just lost her last remaining family member. The only one she was biologically related to at that.

I ran toward her and tried to take her into my arms. My arms went right through her and I watched as my crying sister slowly took a step towards the broken me.

An earsplitting roar peirced the lightening dawn and I spun my incorporeal body around just in time to see Spike get up and run towards the crate my body had landed on. He threw himself to the ground beside my head and started talking frantically. At my distance I couldn't hear the words so I moved closer and swallowed a sob as his words became clear. Just 5 words. Over and over again, and those 5 words broke my heart.

_Wake up, you're not dead!_

Now these 5 words appeared in different order everytime they came out. I may not be the President of the Spike fanclub, but these past few months he's been there for me during my worst moments when no one else was. I was developing feelings for him, and if I wasn't sure before, the display happening right in front of me proved without a doubt that he loved me.

I watched him as the sun finally appeared on the horizon, and as he started smoking. So lost in his dispair he didn't even react to the pain. If he even felt it, I don't know, but he didn't react to it. Not until Dawn and Giles opulled him into the shade anyways. I blindly followed the trio as Giles instructed the Scoobies to either get to the hospital or to wait for the coroner, then walked the griefstricken vampire and Key towards the entrance to the sewer. I followed as they continued toward Revello Drive through the sewers.

I watched as they went inside and sat on the couch. I watched as Giles ascended the stairs to get bandages. I watched as Spike put his arms around my sister, and I watched as the two of them cried.

Giles cleaned all of their wounds and sent Dawn up to bed. I watched as she refused to leave Spikes side, and I watched as he brought her upstairs. Dawn stopped in front of my bedroom door, took a deep breath and opened it. Spike hesitated in the doorway so I placed my ghostly hand on his arm and placed a kiss on his cheek. As if sensing me, he put his hand to his cheek and glanced in my direction. Dawnie grabbed his hand and pulled him over to my bed.

The duo layed down and Dawn put her head on his chest as his arms snaked around her waist. Without a word, the two silently cried. Eventually Dawnie cried herself to sleep. Spike stayed wide awake however and I crawled into bed and snuggled into his back, placing my arms around his waist. I willed him to stop crying and when he turned his head to look at where I was laying, i imagine he saw me here. He unconciously was looking me directly in the eyes and stared into them, a ghost of a smile on his lips as his tears slowly died. He eventually fell asleep with his head still turned in my direction.

I layed there watching him for quite a while, replaying every moment with him in the past months. I tried to decipher my feelings for him. Hours passed and i finally came up with an answer.

Without a thought to it, I floated up off the bed until i was suspended above it looking down. I spared one last small smile for the two before everything went white and blank. I whispered those four little words he's longed to hear.

_I love you, Spike._


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey I'm sorry about the wait! Here's chapter 2 :)**

* * *

><p>I was timeless. I don't know how much time had passed since I entered this place full of light. The entire place was timeless. Time didn't exist. I was happy.<p>

But that was taken from me.

I wake up with no air. _No air! Need air! Dark! Can't see! Need air! Help! Help please! Can't breathe!_

The space is tiny and dark; suffocating. I need out but can't get my bearings.

_Help somebody please! Don't know—What's happening? Please!_

I can't get any sound out and start to panic. My hands claw at the fabric above me that has sealed me into this prison.

_Gotta get out! Out! Now! Please somebody! Help me please! Can't breathe!_

Nothing is more important at this time than getting out. Name? Not important. How I got here? Also not important. I rip through the fabric ande start frantically punching and kicking at the wood.

_Ow ow ow! It hurts! Hurts! Lungs burn! Need air! Ow! Hands! Hands hurt! Please! So scared! Help!_

Somewhere in the midst of my non-sensical mental rambling, a tiny voice was talking to me. It was a male—I knew that much—with an accent my muddled mind couldn't quite place. His voice was calming. Calmingly telling me not to panic and to keep trying.

As I worked on my cage, he talked to me. He told me his name was William and that when I fought my way out he'd find me. He said he knew me, said I went away. William said the Niblet missed terribly. Who's Nibblet? Why would I go away if people missed me like he said?

My hands break through the wood and dirt cascades down onto my face. I crawl upward through the dirt, slowly making my way to safety. William is still speaking to me. He's telling me about all the adventures we would go on. He said I was a hero. That I saved the world. A lot. If I were a hero like he said, why can't I get free? Why was I lost?

I ask him about him. Ask him to tell me some of his adventure stories. He tells me that he's travelled all over the world. Tells me of the rolling hills of England, and the people of China. Tells of a place called Prague. His stories are endless.

I ask if I'm ever going to get free. Tell him I'm starting to get scared again. HE says I'm almost there and not to give up. I believe him and begin listening once more to the soft cadence of his voice.

Finally my hand pierces the surface and I bring my other hand up to meet it and dig my fingers into the soil like WIlliam tells me to. I pull my head out of the dark and take a huge gulp of air before I pull the rest of my body up.

I crawl forward and rest my back up against a rock to calm my breathing like William says to. Eventually I stand on shaky legs and spin around to get my bearings. My eyes are drawn to the rock I had been leaning against and my eyes widen. It was a gravestone. Although my memories hadn't returned, my basic knowledge was returning, and from what I remember, a gravestone marks the final resting place of the dead.

It read;

Buffy Anne Summers  
>1981-2001<br>Beloved Sister  
>Devoted Friend<br>She Saved The World  
>A Lot<p>

Panicing, I ask William what my name is. It takes a few minutes but he finally answers.

_Buffy._

I open my mouth and scream.


End file.
